The Day the Cat Ate My Avocado

I suppose he technically did not actually eat my avocado. It was more like he kidnapped it and mauled it.

That day was today. It all started as an innocent plan to have tacos for dinner. In the morning, I set the avocado out on the counter to make sure I would remember it, since I don't always get those decadent little treats. Why the cat got on the counter is a simple enough mystery. He got up there because he was not supposed to. That's why cats do anything.

The real question is, what in the world compelled him to knock it off the counter, drag it into the next room, then proceed to maul it? My theory is our cat has a grizzly bear complex. I'm almost sure of it. He thinks he is a grizzly bear!

Like a grizzly bear, he prowls around looking for some unsuspecting migratory animal to get separated from its herd. And since we live in North Carolina, and there are no caribou wandering through our kitchen, he spotted the most likely candidate: my avocado! Instinctively, he channeled his inner grizzly bear, and the rest is history.

For the record, my tacos were fine without the avocado, even though it was a substantial let down. But while the cat is strutting around victoriously, I am plotting revenge.

The next time my wife breaks out the cat treats, I'll be ready. When she throws the treats for the cats …